My breakup letter to Shonda Rhimes

Dear Shonda Rhimes,

We need to talk.

I want to start out by saying, Shonda, that it has been a privilege. The time we’ve spent together over the years have been some of the best of my life. You made me feel things I didn’t know I was capable of feeling.

When I look back on my life, I know that I will always think of our time together fondly. You made me into the person I am today. I am a better person because of you.

But Shonda, I was so young when this all started. I didn’t know who I was back then and I didn’t know what I wanted. I wish I had known then what I know now.

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Happier times.

This hasn’t been easy. We haven’t always had good times. In fact, we’ve seen a lot of heartache. And sometimes, even when two people love each other the way we do, sometimes love just isn’t enough.

For so long, I’ve tried to deny it, but we’ve been growing apart for some time now. And as hard as it is to admit, we’re going down different paths.

I wish it was different. I wish we could have made this work. But I just don’t have it in me.

I have to focus on me right now. You’ll be fine without me. You’re so strong.

What I’m trying to say, Shonda, is that you don’t make me happy anymore and I think this relationship, this relationship that used to be so beautiful, has become unhealthy.

Maybe it’s my fault because I didn’t end things when I found out Derek had a wife. That was such a red flag. But I was in too deep and I needed to believe it would work out.

My friends thought I was crazy for staying after Cristina was left at the altar. But I knew we would get through it together.

When Denny died, I thought that would be our lowest point and if I could just drag myself off the bathroom floor, it would be okay.

Sometimes, I felt like I was drowning and couldn’t go on. But I knew giving up wasn’t the answer.

Maybe, by the time George died, I was just too damaged to walk away. I couldn’t imagine life without you.

When the shooter walked into the hospital, I think I mostly stuck around to see how far you would go. I dared you to pull that trigger. It was like you wanted to hurt me.

But then things got better again and I could pretend that I was happy. I pretended we still were those bright-eyed interns who were so in love.

I thought you were going to take Callie or Arizona from me in that accident – but what you did was so much worse. You put Arizona on that plane and you saved her, only to rip her best qualities from her.

And how dare you kill Lexi right after she and Mark were finally going to work out? We could’ve been together forever.

This is what you do, Shonda. And I can’t deal with it anymore.

Killing. Isn’t. Always. The answer. It’s the easy way out. It’s murder. But you know all about getting away with murder, don’t you?

And this… this thing I can’t even talk about… this Derek business…. this was the last straw.

I don’t even know the person you are. Because the person I fell in love with would never have done what you have. But then, maybe I never really knew you.

Please don’t try to stop me. I’ve made up my mind. I want off the carousel. It’s for the best.

Maybe someday we can be friends. I hope so.

Fondly and with a broken heart,

Your ex-person.

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A Prescription of Short Poppies

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If you need a pick me up, it should be the 20 minute series Short Poppies. Seriously. I was in some sort of mood and feeling all sorts of ways, so I streamed an episode (or four) on Netflix, and had my woes banished by Rhys tumblr_n59kbht5U91rb5wuyo1_540Darby’s sexy suncreeny lifeguard legs, Rhys Darby in normcore drag, Rhys Darby as a very professional UFOlogist.

The series is a mockumentary that follows filmmaker and journalist David Farrier as he interviews extraordinary residents of a beachy town in New Zealand. Each episode focuses on an oddball character, all of which are played by the talented Rhys Darby. If you’ve ever watched Flight of the Concords, you’ll maybe recognize Darby as the band manager, Murray Hewitt.

In the first episode, Darby plays Terry Pole, an optimistic lifeguard, whose catchphrase  is “only the pos!” (as in positive). You just really cannot be anything but smiley when there is a sexy legs competition happening before your very eyes.

Screen Shot 2015-05-11 at 11.27.11 PMOne episode will have you reevaluating your relationship goals. Like… is your significant other someone you can be your oddest possible self with? Do you support each others’ passions? Would you overcome your greatest phobias for your special friend? Could you see yourself blissfuly starting a support group together for survivors of alien abductions that meets at the local library weekly? Because really, a successful relationship is overcoming your agoraphobia to tell your UFOlogist boyfriend that you love him before he sacrifices himself for an alien abduction.

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But the real reason I enjoy Short Poppies is David Farrier, the journalist who plays himself. He’s the quietest character, but his facial expressions speak volumes. AND HE IS SUCH A GEEKY DREAMBOAT.

And also Karl Urban as the sassiest, gayest hairdresser there ever was.

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Watch this is if you like: Summer Heights High, Flight of the Concords, the Office, Parks and Rec

Stay tuned,

Angelica

How Netflix is Getting me through College

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As a college student about to graduate, I am constantly searching for inspiration. Motivation to continue working on long projects and believing that someday I might actually graduate is hard sometimes. Kimmy Schmidt was a breath of fresh motivation for me.

Most of the Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt is centered around using positivity and believing in one’s own ability to move on and be successful to get through really tough situations. Having survived living in a bunker for many years, Kimmy has developed this skill beautifully and teaches the people around her to do the same.

Some advice she gives includes:

1. Smile.

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Sometimes I feel pretty bogged down by little things. I tend to stress about various papers and people. Having experienced real difficulty, Kimmy has helped me realize that most of my own obstacles are fairly small and totally beatable.

2. Having no idea what you are doing is not the end of the world.

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As an almost-graduate, it is really scary stopping to realize that in just a few months I will be entering the “grown-up” world. I will probably have to wear “business casual” every day and be trusted to actually know what I am talking about. Kimmy helped me to understand that it is okay to admit that I have no idea what I am doing. I have dreams. I want to look like a real grown-up one day, but it’s okay if I don’t get there for a few months after graduation.

3. Weird is the new “cool”

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Another reason why I don’t have to act like I have it altogether? Because crazy pink shoes and messing up every so often in front of everyone is HOT… and probably something I will continue to do for the rest of my life. Thank you Kimmy for making me slightly more comfortable for being myself.

Thank you Buzzfeed, Giphy, and Netflix Life for the media in this post.

Gwen

Top Five Reasons To Get Amazon Prime Video

And they are all Tatiana Maslany.

There’s a show, you might have heard some buzz about it, it’s called Orphan Black.

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Guys.

Guys.

Guys.

This show is amazing.

This show has the plot, the dialogue, the characters, the acting, the intrigue and just about anything else you could ask for in a TV show.

The only downfall is that it’s hard to get a hold of because it’s a BBC America show. If you have cable and that cable has BBC America in its package then you’ve probably already been watching Orphan Black (and if you haven’t, WHY DO YOU EVEN HAVE CABLE?) and loving it. But if you’re an Amazon Prime member, you can start watching season one of this show tonight. And you should.

Now, I don’t want to give too much away, I don’t, and it’s going to be difficult. But I’ll let you know just enough: This is a show about family, really. And conspiracy. See, there’s this girl, Sarah, and she’s been leading a pretty hard and fast life. But she returns to make things right with her absolutely adorable daughter so they can be a family. That’s when she sees herself walk in front of a train and DIE. Or someone who looks identical to her. So, she does what any rational person would do when you see your doppleganger commit suicide – she takes her purse and assumes her identity.

This would probably be a pretty decent premise if it just stopped there. BUT IT DOESN’T. No. This show is never that basic.

This show is about clones, guys. AND THEY’RE ALL PLAYED BY THE SAME ACTRESS WHO IS PHENOMENAL and every character is so unique that you will literally forget that you’re
watching the same actress.

That’s the biggest and only spoiler I will give you.

There’s a great ensemble here as well and terrific writing but what stands out the most is Tatiana Maslany’s stellar performances. All of them.

Also, watch out for Felix who is, arguably, the snarkiest, most caring, most fabulous brother to ever be.

e282f81d5d545a3fd1c539737f37b032If you’re not convinced or you’re on the fence about this show, just watch the first episode. If you don’t like it (you will), I will, like, buy you a sandwich or something.

So, stop reading this and go find out if your mother, brother, best friend, roommate, sestra, whoever has Amazon Prime so you can start streaming this immediately. Season 3 started last night.

Welcome to the Clone Club.